Who I Am Is My Choice

How can one begin to find a way forward when one's look back is so convoluted; who do we become after generations of lies?

If one is honest, one can see the progression of lies, in various forms, throughout their life. At which point does one ask: "With all the lies throughout my life, who does that make me?"

Does that make me someone which blindly accepts that a small group of people, or mass psychosis, have 'authority' over my body, my choices and my life? (See what I did there?)

Does that make me someone which accepts projected fears as valid without any sort of verification through unbiased discernment and gleefully projects them forward?

Does that make me someone which would alienate and ostracize those which disagree with my beliefs and refuse to validate my fears based in total ignorance, even if they are my own family?

Does that make me someone which tries to justify and excuse away anything which would require honest reflection on the position of my moral compass? How far back does this go?

Does that make me a lying hypocrite?

I know most people would rush to defend my 'nice' points but being a 'nice' person, or not is a mute point.

"Am I an honest person?" is perhaps a more apt question.

Lies, false promises and skulduggery would seem to be the cornerstones of our current version of "human civilization". For they seem to be the most prevalent examples I have witnessed in my 53 years on this weird experience we call "life".

Take your pick: politics (the easy one), governance (slave word), education, labor, alimentation, energy, and it goes on and on. Look back honestly on anything really and try to convince yourself that it was not all based in lies and deceit.

So again, who does that make me without taking away the 'good' stuff? How could I even consider that the 'program' does not affect me and has not affected through the entirety of my growth?  Just like I could never believe that not everyone has the same capacity to learn and grow.

Many are just now realizing that they have been 'at war' their entire lives whilst many are simply seeing that they are 'now' at war. There are so many levels of awareness to stumble through in what is called "The Awakening", and so much repetition over the years in an endless game of 'catch up'. All the while many still mistake the 'goal' to be a destination rather than a journey or even something completely removed from themselves, be it 'savior' or 'demon' which they 'discover' through 'information' and now have more reasons to direct hatred towards whatever enemy they have uncovered.

There is no growth through exoneration. One cannot find their soul in a rabbit hole.

"Until one day we have billions and billions of people on the Earth who collectively have an IQ of 40." - Jordan Maxwell (RIP sir)

Now here is a question: Have the last 2 years disproved that statement from Mr. Maxwell?

As one of many, many examples: it takes a special kind of stupid to believe that one can 'insult' the entire species and not simply individuals (triggered).

That feeling insulted, is a subjective thing, in which if I do not give you the power to insult me, you cannot do so. That there is great importance in defining intention versus perception within our own thought processes and reactions. It is my choice to feel insulted.

So simple of a concept which would perhaps have helped if it had perpetuated forward but rather, look where we are now; when we get hurt by words we tend to throw sticks and stones.

Is that where we are? How high of an IQ score do you think it takes to be someone which reacts 'insulted' to most things which would help them ponder, realize, learn and grow?  Because really, that is what people fight against: growing up, taking responsibility and thinking for themselves.

How high a score to continue being fearful simply for the sake of being fearful and perpetuate forward lie after lie?

Is that not what we have been doing, in one form another, for generations? Could this not have all been avoided by simply living to become better human beings rather than compete to have the 'best stuff'? When did we lose our humanity?

Perhaps it has to do, in part, with the intention and perception of life as we know it. What one often perceives can be far different than the reality. So what would be our intention if one perceives others intentions as counter? If one perceives that any of this is real or relevant to becoming better human beings, then what is the intention? Does an industry which feeds off of people's fears, have well intentions? Did I just personally insult every insurance agent out there? And there are many more examples to churn through such as health, which also has a firm base in fear.

So who do I become in this soup of lies and deceit which is multi-generational and increasingly pervasive? That would be totally up to me. It is my choice to accept any of this and play along with it in any way. It is my choice to go to institutions (ha) of higher learning for so many differing reasons even if most root back to fear.

It is my choice to not grow (up).

Now guess what, we can also choose to release ourselves. We must first choose to be honest with our selves and choose not to fall into self-pity. We must choose to accept our own culpability and realize our responsibility in ceasing to perpetuate it forward. We must see ourselves as the retarded children of our 'system', which generations of 'nudging' has formed and demand of ourselves that we grow up; little by little, shedding the childish reactions which hinder our growth. Bit by bit we become better humans. And that is what it is to 'grow up'.

For only by becoming better human beings can we create a better human world.

Here's hoping it is not too late.